i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
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I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
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Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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