I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Randomize
