Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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