thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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