you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
