Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize
