are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
