I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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