Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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