how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
