I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
