yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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