If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
