He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize