I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Holy shit dude........stairs
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