when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
True college students do jello shots in the library
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
