so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
