Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
