Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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