If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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