Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
