At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
