I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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