When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
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I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
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Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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