she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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