okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize