Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
time to smoke my breakfast
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
