Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
