i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Randomize
