Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
So gin and wine won't be happening again
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
