I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
