Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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