How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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