I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
