opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
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