I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
