just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
