so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize