I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
How's work?
Spinning.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
