hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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