So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
