The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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