I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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