Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
