He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
