she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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