No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
be right there i have to get my cape
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize