420 ftw
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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