In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
