Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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