You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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